March Theme: Creating Your Identity

03/02/2014 · 12 comments

in Creating Your Identity, Monthly Theme, Noa Gavin

Last week, we talked about the fact that you are all you need, and that you have the ability to be the person you want to be.

And that’s all fine and good…but…who are you exactly? What do you want to be? What is your identity? If someone put a gun to your head and told you to write down exactly who you are, could you do it beyond screaming and saying that you’re a people person who loves to laugh?

I’m not sure that I could. My first instinct would be to tell you that I’m an improvisor, that I’m a writer, that I run a photography business. That I am married and I have two dickhead cats and a dog that tries to shove her whole head in your mouth when you yawn. That my favorite movie is A League Of Their Own.

Is that an identity? Is that ‘who I am?’

To be honest, I feel stupid even asking this question of myself. Who am I? Well, why the fuck does it matter outside of an interview with Oprah that will now never happen because she retired and I am nowhere near famous? I feel like a hipster telling my mom and dad that I just need to ‘find myself.’

Here’s the thing though–we need to ask this question of ourselves. We need to know who we are, what we are about, or we risk going through our entire lives without any direction at all.

We’ve all seen those people who seem to be that glaze-eyed fish in the school, just sort of going on along with everyone else but having no real opinion of themselves or others or the world at large. They live their lives aimlessly, they get somewhere, but is it even really worth it?

As stupid as I feel for asking myself, “Who are you, Noa Gavs? What is your identity?” I feel even sicker about living aimlessly and without real purpose.

So that’s what we’re talking about this month. Who are we? How did we get to the realization of who we are? What do we do with it when we know? What happens when we feel our identity changes?

Bitches, sound off–who are you?

Abby March 3, 2014 at 7:15 am

I feel the same way that you do, that it’s ridiculous and eye-rolling to say, “Who am I?” or talk about finding yourself. But as they say, it’s not about finding yourself. It’s about creating yourself, and that’s what is so GD scary. I know who I am deep down, but I don’t feel like I’m authentically living that way which is why I have so many issues. Sigh. How do I get to point B from point A? I guess that’s what they call the “journey.” I guess that’s also why this month will be hard for me to write about, but it’s obviously worth my time. I look forward to your next posts–and those from everyone else.
Abby recently posted..Measuring Up

Noa March 6, 2014 at 3:08 pm

I hate this question, and I have a sick need to explore the things I hate. WHO AM I? I sound like I should be on Investigation Discovery.

But, we’ll figure it out. We’ll get there.

nadine March 3, 2014 at 3:17 pm

This is so complex… to speak of oneself so definitively. Who am I? Am I more that what I do and what I like? Of course I am.

Who am I vs. What am I …. it’s hard to separate the two.

I am a loyal person who uses humor and food to try to smooth over any situation. I’m a person who is trying and evolving every day to be a “good” person. Whatever that means. I am someone who doesn’t have it all figured out and can’t shoehorn myself into any clear category that would be so easy for others. I can’t proudly declare “I’m a mother. I’m a wife. I’m a college graduate.” I’m none of those things, and it doesn’t make me lesser than. I’m someone who’s been through a lot and still maintains more optimism than jadedness than one would expect from someone in my shoes.

That’s my short “who am I” idea right now.

Noa March 6, 2014 at 3:09 pm

I love this explanation. I love the separation between “who” and “what” because too often it feels like people are asking what we are instead of who.

Roxie March 3, 2014 at 4:02 pm

I am the walrus, coo-coo-ca-choo.

Noa March 6, 2014 at 3:09 pm

I knew this would happen.

Valerie March 3, 2014 at 8:59 pm

Well, shit… Who would think such a question would be so hard to answer but it is. Mostly, it’s because it depends on the day. Yesterday I was very strong and confident. Today, I need reminding I was yesterday because today makes me want to hide under the covers. Hopefully tomorrow I can be yesterday again.

Also, I’m crazy. So that helps explain the above paragraph.


Valerie recently posted..I think its pretty safe to say that we all share this dream

Noa March 6, 2014 at 3:10 pm

I change personalities as often as my shirt. I feel ya.

Johi Kokjohn-Wagner March 4, 2014 at 1:27 pm

I’m Johi. The one and only.
Johi Kokjohn-Wagner recently posted..How I Became a Writer: My Story.

Noa March 6, 2014 at 3:10 pm

Goddamn right you are.

alexandra March 17, 2014 at 7:40 am

I’m stuck right here: who we are and how people see us. What blows my mind is the disconnect. I am not the way I’m seen. Figure that one out. Thank you for this one.

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