Fuckin’ Bitch Friday: You’re Not Pretty Enough

02/20/2014 · 1 comment

in Enough, Fuckin' Bitch Friday

Ever felt like you were ugly?

Like you were just, no matter what, never going to be pretty enough?

Ever been told that? If you went to high school, then most likely, right?

Ever been told that you’re not pretty enough by your husband as a defense for why he cheated on you?

Jen Tress, the author of You’re Not Pretty Enough has. That statement, that one-off dig, both hit her to the core and changed her life. Then, it changed the lives of hundreds of other people. You guys, Jen Tress is a fuckin’ badass, and the book is a must-read.

book_cover

Tress tells her abridged life story in the book, beginning as a very…precocious…child, a boy-crazy Bon-Jovi Crazy teen, a love-struck and love-hurt twenty-something, and a happily (and happy to work on being happy) married lady. The stories make you laugh–out loud–and then teach you a life lesson in an unexpected way. For instance, we learned in The Sex Papers that maybe giving vivid anatomical descriptions of sex to a 4-year-old is a bit much. And in Shot Through The Heart, if you just wish hard enough, you miiiight make Jon Bon Jovi love you. Someday. We hope.

Largely, the book is about her journey of self-acceptance and the events that lead her to that point, and a major one is her first marriage dissolving thanks to what I’d like to refer to as a fucking asshole. She tells the story of her strained marriage, his cheating, her confrontation, and her life afterwards.

I loved the pure bold honesty in this book. This isn’t a fancy, cutesy memoir of life through rose-tinted glasses. Tress spends the book telling you the honest truth about her life–good and bad.

There were moments in the book that I had to put it down out of anger of what was being said to her, from friends, family, and relatives. The vitriol that she endured was enraging. And then, I’d realize in my anger that someone had said those very things to me once, and that I had reacted like her, and I am too on my own journey of self-acceptance.

It was enlightening to connect with this life story, to see that people can and are terrible to you for their own terrible reasons, and that with gritted teeth and a fuck-you attitude, you can and will come out the other side stronger, better, and enough.

She pulls no punches on others, and especially not for herself. Tress goes into detail about how she became who she is, every bad and good choice, shamelessly on display. It is brave, and it connected me to her story.

This book is for everyone, because her message is for everyone–You Are Enough.

Her message carries over into her website and her movement–You’re Not Pretty Enough. Tress learned in her research and travels that the idea of not feeling pretty enough was incredibly pervasive on our culture worldwide. That we, as a society, do a great job of telling our girls that we’re never going to be good enough for anyone, and that is damaging the confidence and potential of hundreds of thousands (if not millions!) worldwide. So what did she do?

She started a motherfuckin’ gang, with motherfuckin’ resources and videos and stories to unite us all together and remind us how fuckin’ pretty we are–THE PRETTIEST. This Bitch is rad as fuck.

Jen Tress, The League salutes you.

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