In case you’re a terrible person who’s culturally ignorant (CALLBACKS, Y’ALL. NOA’S BRINGING THE HEAT), you’ve probably read or seen the Harry Potter series or at least know that it exists.
If you don’t know that it even exists, how do you have the internet? That’s all anyone seems to reference is Doctor Who, Harry Potter, or Breaking Bad. Are you Amish? Go home, Amish Person.
In Harry Potter, they have a peculiar creature called a Boggart: a spirit who lives in small spaces and when confronted by someone, they manifest to that person as that person’s greatest fear.
Such as: a moon for a werewolf, a banshee for Seamus Finnegan, and failure for Hermione Granger (no, for real, go look that shit up). As it’s close to Halloween and spooky shit is abound, I wonder, what’s your Boggart?
Add yours (both serious and joke or any or all) to the comments below!
Joke-Off: What’s Your Boggart?
- Candy Corn Pumpkins
- The nude view of my own ass
- A broken light bulb in the hallway of my storage unit
- A public listing of all the anime that I watch to people who don’t like me
- People who don’t like me
- That guy from High School who had a small dick and I told one girl and she told everyone
- The game RISK
- Fucking Moths, you guys. Shit is scary
- Kanye West
- Going to the bank
- A small uncontained fire far away from me but I can do nothing about
- Bill charge worth disputing
- Grocery stores
- The movie The Red Violin
- Ted Cruz
- Forever 21’s checkout people
- Needing a nice dress outside of prom and formal season
- Bra shopping
- Someone swiping right or left when I show them a photo on my phone
- A Hot Pocket
- The game Perfection
- Chuck E Cheese
- The birthday of someone you don’t know well
- Gender Reveal Parties
- Andy Dick
- Having to create an account for a website I’ll only need one thing from ever
- Going to watch a baseball game live with someone who cares about baseball
- A person who walked in halfway through a show and wants to ask a lot of questions
- Vague status updates
- That space behind my faucet that can’t get cleaned
- Asian Hornets
- Someone reading the first draft of anything I write and cringing