03/22/2013 · 21 comments

in Funny Bitch Friday

It’s voting time again!

Let’s honor our all-time favorite blogs by giving them a place in the League Of Funny Bitches All-Star list in the sidebar! These are the blogs that have us in staples, not stitches. These are the blogs that make us throw up from laughing, not just cry. These are the masters of the universe. Also, He-Man is there.

Next Friday, I’ll announce the new list of All-Stars, and until then, a full week of voting! Vote for as many as you want–make sure you scroll down through the list. There are approximately a shitton of Funny Bitches (which is directly contradictory to Adam Carolla’s existence.)

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This Week’s Thursday Throwdown Winner Is:

Beth: Temporary Tourette’s Syndrome

I’m pretty sure this will be the newest vanity diagnosis for people who want attention. Here’s your gif!


Jen March 22, 2013 at 7:30 am

Oh shit. . .pressure’s on. There’s only so many hours in the day to hire the requisite amount of hitmen to take out my competition like a Texas cheerleader’s mama.
Jen recently posted..I Love Everyone…Except Jessica Chastain, Apparently.

Misty March 22, 2013 at 7:55 am

You can’t kill ninjas . . . you can’t even find them. Bring it, bitch! :p

(And by bitch, I obviously mean of the funniest variety. Love you!!).
Misty recently posted..Mustache Winner!!

Jen March 22, 2013 at 8:59 am

Boo, you whore.
Jen recently posted..I Love Everyone…Except Jessica Chastain, Apparently.

Tracy @ Momaical March 22, 2013 at 9:24 am

Wow! What a great list of funny bloggers!

Emelie March 22, 2013 at 9:26 am

Oh, Hyperbole and a Half… Please come back to us!!
Emelie recently posted..Community

Tamara Wainscott March 22, 2013 at 10:43 am

We love Johi! “Confessions of a Corn Fed Girl”

Audra March 22, 2013 at 11:11 am

bitches gotta eat is my JAMMMMM.

Erica March 22, 2013 at 11:32 am

If I’m ever needing a laugh, I always read the blog Jen e se quios……I cannot spell French to save my life. All her stories are very relative and cleverly hilarious because of her great sarcasm. Love, love love her!!!

Anna March 22, 2013 at 11:39 am

Go Val

Jason Weller March 22, 2013 at 11:55 am

I went to high school with Jen from jene sais quoi. She was a funny bitch then too and I am proud to see she has not changed from the 15-year-old girl who shoved french fries up her nose at McDonald’s and approached the counter with a deadpan expression stating “We’re going to need a LOT more ketchup”. I haven’t forgotten that or a million other stories that I can and will dredge up if she ever runs for office. Good job, Squid.

Jen March 22, 2013 at 12:24 pm

Ho. Ly. Shit. Wells, no one’s called me Squid since high school. But I may still do the French fry thing…I’m just sayin’. How the hell are you? :)
Jen recently posted..I Love Everyone…Except Jessica Chastain, Apparently.

Jarrod March 22, 2013 at 11:58 am

It’s all about Valerie and the Flying Platypi

Valerie March 22, 2013 at 1:05 pm

Oh man… I wonder if I can teach squirrels to vote for me. I mean… I know I can. But is there enough time.


Valerie recently posted..Sometimes you get to go to San Diego and pretend to be a spy.

Abby March 22, 2013 at 3:41 pm

Vote for Abby Has Issues! She’s hilarious and has never made the list and saves abandoned unicorns who were rejected for dysfunctional sexual organs and shitting glitter!

Wait…this comment will be published anonymously, right? Because otherwise, hee hee, vote for whoever you want! That would be RIDICULOUS to promote myself for validation!
Abby recently posted..Headlines From My House

Allie March 22, 2013 at 4:35 pm

I should probably vote for myself but can’t in good conscience when Bitches Gotta Eat is a thing.

However, I’m Not Really a Barista is gladly accepting pity votes. And pity fucks. Really pity anything you’re offering.
Allie recently posted..Every day is Not Valentine’s Day. I Will Stab You with an Arrow.

Banana Stickers March 28, 2013 at 11:04 pm

OMG.. the pressure.
Not just to make the list, but I DON’T KNOW WHO TO VOTE FOR.
So many fantastic bitches up in there.
Like human-sized anti-depressants that are the kind you read and don’t have horrid side effects.
Banana Stickers recently posted..No. I Do Not Want To Go To Your Weird Lady Party.

Jeneral Insanity March 28, 2013 at 11:23 pm

Holy flying crap-monkeys! I just came here to vote for Cerebral Milkshake because she said to, and I always do what I’m told to online. I fear the Gods of the Interwebs. There are so many on here that I already read, and now I feel like there are so many MORE that I need to check out because, what the crap?! I’m sure that everyone on this list is fabulous.

This is really going to put a damper on my current internet stalking. I feel like I should start grinding beans now, because my family yells at me when I make fresh espresso at 3 in the morning because I’m up reading blogs again because I can’t do it during the day when people are counting on me to feed them and keep them alive and stuff.
Damn kids.

Feck. And I already signed myself up for that stupid A-Z thing. Thanks, Banana Stickers. You’re kind of a dick.
Jeneral Insanity recently posted..I need to have a fire safety talk with the voices in my head

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