Funny Bitch Friday: Pintester

07/20/2012 · 17 comments

in Funny Bitch Friday

I have a love-hate with Pinterest. On one hand, I did learn how to alter a bunch of old t-shirts really well, and I’m a terrible sewess (sewer? Sewing magician? Not a wordsmith here). On the other hand, I’ve learned exactly nothing else. Most of the crafts look impossible, and those that look do-able look unbelievably stupid or impractical. I thought I was alone in thinking this.

Wrong. Pintester is fucking up Pinterest crafts so we don’t have to! She’s also funny, which makes this fantastic blog hilarious where it very well could have been sad and life-destroying.

Shaving Cream and Listerine Foot Mask

Miracle Mask

Clementine Candle

Popsicle Stick Bracelet

10-Minute No-Sew T-Shirt Bag

Drunk Gummies

Now I don’t feel so bad. It’s not me, it’s just that Pinterest is a goddamn liar.

Favorite Comment From The Last Post:
From Lauren @ Filing Jointly: “Haven’t experienced any sexism so far in my quest to be a famous humor blogger and quit my job and spend my days blogging with my feet in a tub of water and japanese pedicure fish. I do get some jobism from time to time with comments like ‘This girl is kind of funny, and she’s an ACCOUNTANT!” But that doesn’t offend me, because, you know, accountants are fucking boring.”
Dani July 20, 2012 at 10:12 am

I fucking hate Pinterest. Hate it. It reminds me of those horrible years (the late 80s, early 90s) when my sister started gluing dried flowers on straw hats and giving them to me as presents.

Don’t even get me started on the mop dolls.

Oh wait… that was me. Never mind.
Dani recently posted..That awkward moment…

Dani July 20, 2012 at 10:32 am

Oh, and also? I’m totally going to make one of those t-shirt tote bags. For real. Because I need a new hat.
Dani recently posted..That awkward moment…

Jillian July 20, 2012 at 10:41 am

I’m not on Pinterest because I don’t need any more excuses to look at something and say, “I could do that!” Because I can’t. Then you introduce me to this blog, and I reflect on the past year I spent working three jobs and keeping very close track of Ann Curry’s wardrobe, and I think, “Damn it! I could have totally done that!”
Jillian recently posted..Keep Holding On

Dani July 20, 2012 at 11:27 am

For some reason, I now have to go google Ann Curry’s wardrobe. DAMN YOU.
Dani recently posted..That awkward moment…

Jen July 20, 2012 at 3:40 pm

I love Ann Curry, and not just because she is a fellow Oregonian. I’d like to shove my webbed foot up Matt Lauer’s sphincter for getting her shitcanned. NBC can eat a bag of dicks.
Jen recently posted..Foodie Friday: Holy Guacamole!

Jillian July 20, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Oh no. Something on which we disagree. I was afraid this day would come…
Jillian recently posted..Keep Holding On

Jillian July 20, 2012 at 5:41 pm

It’s just…odd. My tiny brain and big boobs just cannot comprehend some of the articles she puts on her body. Not to mention the rain boots she wore a few weeks back. If puke yellow could become neon, that’s what color they were. It’s a real thing.
Jillian recently posted..Keep Holding On

Jen July 20, 2012 at 6:01 pm

She can’t help it. Have you seen the way most Oregonian’s dress? It’s like a cross between Almonzo Wilder and the bait girl on “To Catch a Predator”. It’s in her blood.
Jen recently posted..Foodie Friday: Holy Guacamole!

Bex July 21, 2012 at 3:36 pm

This is why I love you Americans. I never have a clue who in the shit y’all are talking about. I feel like I’m spying on some top secret FBI CIA shit. And I read on in wonder because I have no idea who these people are of whom you speak. Ann Curry wearing spew gumboots = no fucking idea.
P.s I have fallen ill & pretty sure I just coughed up a piece of my throat.
Bex recently posted..Don’t forget your roots

Valerie July 20, 2012 at 10:57 am

The clementine candle could also be called “How to make a molotov out of an orange and Hope.” Or maybe I have “issues” or whatever.


Valerie recently posted..Only YOU can protect yourself from Zombies… Because I will trip your ass.

Mayor Gia July 20, 2012 at 12:51 pm

Ohhh I’m almost scared to click, because I know I’m going to get addicted to this chick.
Mayor Gia recently posted..I’m Collecting Wine Corks

Dani July 20, 2012 at 1:33 pm

Do it, Gia!! DO IT!!

Dani recently posted..That awkward moment…

Jen July 20, 2012 at 3:43 pm

The segment on “beachy waves” is magical. I too have attempted the Nicole Richie look only to walk away looking more like Lionel Richie. And sadly, I just can’t rock that look “all night long (all night), all night, all night long…”
Jen recently posted..Foodie Friday: Holy Guacamole!

Pintester July 23, 2012 at 9:54 am

I’m so honored! I saw this page maybe a week ago and thought, “Man how can I become a part of the LOFB?” And now here I am. Living the dream. Thanks guys!

Also, these comments are making me snort-giggle. Well done.
Pintester recently posted..Keep Calm

Kelly Fox August 7, 2012 at 4:00 pm

sighhh. I luurv me some pinterest. I do. I need an intervention. Or a new hobby. Like goat wrangling, or weasle racing or something exciting like that, instead of sitting here midlessly looking at my computer at work all day.
Kelly Fox recently posted..The Foxy Guide to Extermination

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