Funny Bitch Friday: Surviving The World

02/24/2012 · 43 comments

in Funny Bitch Friday

I am in love with Surviving The World for 3 reasons.

1. It is hilarious. Always, always–hilarious is the first qualifier.

2. Dante, the writer, is as smart as Courtney Stodden is riddled with self-esteem issues and cold sores.

3. I have a small crush on Dante.

The lovely Myth recommended him to me, and I’m so very glad she did. His board writings are at times poignant, hilarious, and intelligent, and sometimes his dog shows up in a lab coat. A word of warning, if you put your dog in a lab coat and glasses, I am pretty much indebted to you for life.


Go check out the rest, I’m sure you’ll be sucked in all day long. Keep bringing the funny, y’all!

I cannot tell you how much your comment meant to me on Wednesday. I’ve been really struggling hard for a while and needed so badly to put a voice to how I felt. You all gave me permission to share who I am with you, permission to be not funny, permission to hurt for a little while. I cried reading almost every comment and email because they meant the world to me and made me feel so…normal. Words cannot describe how much you’ve helped me. I felt better today than I have in weeks, and I owe it all to you guys.
Thank you so much for reading, for commenting, and most of all, for sharing your stories and being who you are. I love you all. 
Front Desk Ninja February 24, 2012 at 2:26 am

Oh, lord. Thank you for bringing me more distractions at work!
You’re my go to for distracting shit, Noa.
Never stop.
Front Desk Ninja recently posted..Of Course I’ll Give You A Discount After Cops Come To Take You Away

Jen February 24, 2012 at 9:00 am

We need to hook Dante up with Alex, Max and Gina and watch the shenanigans ensue.
Jen recently posted..Stupidest Crap Ever Spoken By Me and My Friends: Part10

Front Desk Ninja February 24, 2012 at 10:19 am

I’d pay to see that quality material.
Front Desk Ninja recently posted..Dear Jana, You Ask and You Shall Receive; Or, A Day In The Life of Ninja (at work)

Noa March 8, 2012 at 8:52 pm


@Jen: Holy…holy shit.

Myth February 24, 2012 at 2:27 am

Hint for the visually-impaired and the unobservant: at the bottom right corner of every comic, there is a “File Under:” line which contains a joke of its own.

And the archive page has its own jokes too.

It’s three jokes for the price of one. Hot damn, what a deal! Am I right?

Noa March 8, 2012 at 8:53 pm

Also he is attractive. It’s a four-way deal, motherfuckers!

Meg February 24, 2012 at 2:38 am

I’m totally against Whaling and the movie The Cove depressed me, so I’m probably going to hell for laughing so hard at “You could make a krilling”…but that’s funny.
Meg recently posted..A Wise Old Owl

Noa March 8, 2012 at 8:53 pm

I love jokes like that. You want to hate them but you just can’t stop laughing.

Mayor Gia February 24, 2012 at 6:42 am

Hahahahah I’m hooked. Batteries that run on blood? So I COULD become mostly robot one day in the future!!
Mayor Gia recently posted..Friday Photographs!

Ally February 24, 2012 at 10:34 am

Then when the internet asks if you are a robot, it is way more reasonable.
Ally recently posted..Mindy is not a Weenie.

Noa March 8, 2012 at 8:57 pm

@Gia: I imagine that’s a cause/effect thing. 1st the robots, then the destruction of humans, then they use our blood like fossil fuels. Damn that’s morbid.

@Ally: Exactly.

Kelly February 24, 2012 at 8:07 am

Oh my dear God, just when I was stressing out because I was running out of things to do instead of stuff I have to do, you bring me this. Bless you, Noa. BLESS YOU.
Kelly recently posted..Oh, Internet… Quit making me be so serious.

Jen February 24, 2012 at 9:01 am

Ummm, exCUUUUUSE me, Kelly. When you run out of things to do you’re supposed to be texting me, you silly girl! How else will we plan out springtime P-Town adventure? :)
Jen recently posted..Stupidest Crap Ever Spoken By Me and My Friends: Part10

Kelly February 24, 2012 at 4:45 pm

See, this is why I need you, Jen. You make me prioritize. ;)
Kelly recently posted..Misty, you shouldn’t have.

Noa March 8, 2012 at 9:02 pm

@Kelly: I am always there for you on Fridays.

@Jen: I imagine that will result in arrest. Immediate arrest.

Sarah February 24, 2012 at 9:01 am

Oh my word, how have I never heard of Dante before now? This is perfect for my Friday morning funk!
Sarah recently posted..In which I Partake in Some Hypocritical Denigration

Noa March 8, 2012 at 9:03 pm


Jen February 24, 2012 at 9:05 am

Have you seen his “Dead Map of D.C.” and his bar graph outlining our perceived impotance of a college education? All of this made me wonder how his brain was structured until I realized that he had a PhD in engineering. . .suddenly it all made sense. And now I want to have his babies.
Jen recently posted..Stupidest Crap Ever Spoken By Me and My Friends: Part10

Mandi E. February 24, 2012 at 10:31 am

As someone whose husband was a grad student for 8 years, there was a particular board he did about the magnetic attraction of free food after seminars. I’m sure that’s something you can relate to as well.
Mandi E. recently posted..WTF Friday – Sexytime Scares

Noa March 8, 2012 at 9:04 pm

@Jen: YES! He is fucking crazy brilliant and I love that he puts it all out there so we can enjoy his delicious smartness.

@Mandi: That. Sounds. Awesome.

asplenia February 24, 2012 at 9:37 am

I love that guy & his site too!

Your ps was very touching. <3<3<3
asplenia recently posted..Hooonestyyy (sorry, I cannot SEE that word without channeling Billy Joel)

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:32 am

Awwwww. Thanks!

L-Kat February 24, 2012 at 10:11 am

I love Surviving The World! His facial expressions are priceless! Glad you’re feeling a little better – keep your chin up – we’re all rooting for you! :)
L-Kat recently posted..Actual proof that Bigfoot is real

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:36 am

His crazy faces are makin’ me feel a little better!

Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd February 24, 2012 at 10:14 am
Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:36 am

Your gynecologist?

Mandi E. February 24, 2012 at 10:26 am

I love Dante! He reminds me a lot of my husband when he and his nerdy coworkers get together so I also have a small crush. I also love his raptor impressions:

Video of said raptor impressions:

Great pick this week! I haven’t been this excited since Jen and Misty were featured!
Mandi E. recently posted..WTF Friday – Sexytime Scares

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:37 am

Oh dinosaur impressions. You make everything so much better.

Mandi E. February 24, 2012 at 10:29 am

Also, his dog is a bassett hound named German; German Shepard. And he calls his wife “the Swede”. And puts up with some horribly bitchy cats. That’s a hell of a man right there.
Mandi E. recently posted..WTF Friday – Sexytime Scares

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:39 am

I LOVE his dog. It makes me smile so. Also, that lucky whore of a wife.

Sedge | noob-dad February 24, 2012 at 11:45 am

I’ve spent hours upon hours just going through them. …and I thought blogging took time; chalkboards must be horrible.
Sedge | noob-dad recently posted..Baby-Proofing Pains

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:40 am

It’s a timesuck, that’s for sure. You get caught on there and you stay forever and ever.

Bill Dameron February 24, 2012 at 12:34 pm

Hilarious. I must remember to buy a lab coat, maybe then my mother will take me seriously.

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:40 am

Well shit. I’m off to the medical supply store for a lab coat.

Dana the Biped February 24, 2012 at 1:24 pm

Dude, where’s the dog? My tripodian puffster is looking for a companion, preferably one that can pull off a lab coat well enough to write her fake prescriptions, and I wanted to show her a picture.

This is my dog who wants the drugs, mind you. Not me.

Dana the Biped recently posted..Do You Think Craigslist Has Anyone Looking for a Professional Mourner? ‘Cause I Could Totally Do That.

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:41 am

Thank you so much for filling my heart with adorable joy at the words, “tripodan puffster.”

Brandon S February 24, 2012 at 1:34 pm

I really am trying not to look. It’s not easy but there is so…. much….. stuff….. to …. do. Crap.
Brandon S recently posted..Palm Springs Modern – Take a Dip in The Pool!

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:42 am

Enjoy not working forever!

Brett Minor February 24, 2012 at 5:08 pm

Thank you. I will add him to my list of things to waste my time. He is very funny.
Brett Minor recently posted..Kicking Addiction by Going Cold (Angry) Turkey

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:42 am

You’ll never see the light of day again once you start!

elizabeth- flourishinprogress February 28, 2012 at 12:40 pm

I think I’m in love.

This blog is definitely going to make a krilling.
elizabeth- flourishinprogress recently posted..Monday Dare (and giveaway): Mommy, I hope you don’t go to jail.

Noa March 9, 2012 at 1:43 am

I see what you did there.

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