I Have A Stalker. I Work With Her, So That’s Awesome.

10/26/2011 · 50 comments

in HorribleSketch

Sometimes it disturbs me how much alike Alicia and I are and how well we work together across the board.

Well, now I know why.

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Also, check out my new column, “Notes From Your Drunk Grandma,” on Funny Not Slutty!

Favorite Comment From The Last Post:
From Stephanie: “We have 7 cats. There is “Kitty”, “Belthezar”, “Choo-Choo Bear”, “Dr. Smeagol Von Doom, PhD”, “Badger Nubbins”, “Col. Abner Chinopolis”, and “Shreddie Berzerker McWhiskerton (aka Baby Kitty)”. We also took it upon ourselves to re-name some of my Grandmother’s cats. “Snot”, “Mustachio”, “Prof. Ratigan Napier (aka Ratley)”, “Banshee” and “Fluffy Death Machine”. Reading all of those names in succession kinda makes us seem a little crazy. Ah, well. :)”


Stephanie October 26, 2011 at 10:06 am

Stalkers should go on blind dates for you.
Stephanie recently posted..All Things Pumpkin – Top 5 Uses for Pumpkin

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:12 pm

Damnit Alicia, where were you 4 years ago.

Alicia October 26, 2011 at 10:41 pm

Only have the ability to make guys break-up with me, so I think it’s best that I didn’t date for you.

Noa November 2, 2011 at 7:09 pm

I really, really, could have used that skill.

Sarah October 26, 2011 at 10:32 am

Well, crap. Now I’m going to have to keep a closer eye on the one friend who seems to know me so well…
Sarah recently posted..Lightening

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:16 pm

Check behind the shower curtains.

Misty October 26, 2011 at 10:48 am

Look out Noa, I think Alicia may be INSIDE your purse. Is she heavy? At least she will smell good. :)
Misty recently posted..Ye Olde Show and Tell

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:17 pm

She is pretty fold-y. She might be there.

Jaime October 26, 2011 at 10:55 am

I love the creepy music … and her peeking out from behind the shower curtain.. hahaha
Jaime recently posted..a heart as deep as the ocean…

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:17 pm

It was just as creepy live.

Jen October 26, 2011 at 11:19 am

You call THAT stalking? Bitch, please. I can school Alicia on stalking skillz Nathan Fillion- style, yo.
Jen recently posted.."Hell NO! We Won’t GO!"

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:20 pm

Just like Highlander, there can only be one great.

Jayne October 26, 2011 at 11:41 am

OMG, is that a Chrissy doll?
Jayne recently posted..It’s all Ronald Reagan’s fault

Alicia October 26, 2011 at 11:52 am

Yes!!! I found at a thrift store and someone cut her hair off on the sides. The box she was in looks great, but Chrissy looks like a crack whore now…she also has a lazy eye.

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:20 pm

She’s a good representative for us. Crackwhore Babydoll.

Heather Rose October 26, 2011 at 11:45 am

At least your stalker is young and attractive – she could have been a 65 year old man who drives a lime green Mazda Tribute and watches porno flicks titled “Older men, younger women.” True story.
Heather Rose recently posted..Puppy poop and naughty neighbors

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:21 pm

In the sliding scale of stalkers, I did pretty well.

Mamy October 26, 2011 at 12:13 pm

Stalking is the highest form of flattery right behind imitation.
P.S. I’m going to have to sleep with the lights on tonight…that goddamn doll freaks me the hell out!

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:22 pm

You’re welcome for the nightmares.

i am pisspot October 26, 2011 at 1:29 pm

You should totally get Sharpie, the pen manufacturer, to sponsor your videos. I’d totally buy one.

ps: You can use what I said above in your business plan to Sharpie.

ps2: Still TOTALLY fancy the pants off both of you.
i am pisspot recently posted..These things I know

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:25 pm

FUCK YES. Excuse me, I have calls to make.

Carrie - Cannibalistic Nerd October 26, 2011 at 2:23 pm

I don’t know, I think I may like someone who always knows where my keys are. As long as they do a little housework between smelling my sweaters and crying into my placemats, I’m not sure I would mind.
Carrie – Cannibalistic Nerd recently posted..Pictures from Disney World, Which You Wouldn’t Know if I Didn’t Tell You

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:25 pm

Like an invisible sisterwife. I like it.

Dani October 26, 2011 at 2:59 pm

Alicia would make a great husband/boyfriend… She knows you wayyyyy better than my husband knows me. We’ve been together for 10 years and he still doesn’t know my favorite color, what perfume I wear, and that if he gets me anything… ANYTHING with mayonnaise on it, I will hurl. And then throw it at him.

Ummm… Alicia? *toe scuff* I know this is sudden, but would you… marry me?
Dani recently posted..Naked Truth

Alicia October 26, 2011 at 8:16 pm

I’m already hiding in your closet. ;)

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:26 pm

Goddamn it. My closet is so lonely.

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:26 pm


Alicia October 26, 2011 at 10:43 pm

It’s okay…I cloned myself. I’m in everyone’s closet.

Dani October 27, 2011 at 1:21 pm

It’s not fair… Noa gets everything…
Dani recently posted..All Faux Hawked Up

Noa October 27, 2011 at 10:32 pm

I can assure you I did not get the class.

Front Desk Ninja October 28, 2011 at 3:31 am

I read that as the clap the first time.
Thought I’d share.
Front Desk Ninja recently posted..It’s A Ghetto Kind Of Life: Dedicated to Jaclyn, With Love

Noa November 2, 2011 at 7:09 pm

To be fair, I didn’t get that either.

mark @ yelling near you October 26, 2011 at 7:08 pm

So if I don’t have any friends, does that mean I’m the stalker?
mark @ yelling near you recently posted..Bycicles

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:26 pm


Alicia October 26, 2011 at 8:18 pm

Well every website that I load the video on stretches the footage, so I’m trying to fix the file format. Hopefully I’ll have a better version up soon…damn the internet!

Noa October 26, 2011 at 9:27 pm

Damn the internet. Well, YouTube specifically. DAMN IT TO HELL.

Alicia October 26, 2011 at 10:44 pm

FunnyorDie screwed it up too! I shall fix this with the power of Adobe Premier!…or I’ll just go cry.

Jillian (The Other One) October 27, 2011 at 12:11 am

The best thing about these videos (besides the fact that they’re hilarious) is that I can now actually imagine what your voice would sound like saying “twatwaffle” and “crackwhore babydoll.” It’s a new level of awesome.
Jillian (The Other One) recently posted..Didn’t Your Mama Teach You To Use Your Words?

Noa October 27, 2011 at 10:33 pm

Perhaps I shall record a video with us just saying those words.

Also, thanks for glossing over the fact that I sound like a dude.

Front Desk Ninja October 27, 2011 at 3:13 am

It’s okay, Alicia… that’s how I learned how to put makeup on too!

And I’m *still* sofuckingjealous of that goddamn kitchen.
If I promise to bake delicious nomz for you could I come play?
I just want to pet… everything… it’s so pretty looking.

Thanks for making that shit accessible to Canada, Noa and Alicia.
Canada says thank you. Eh.
Front Desk Ninja recently posted..It’s A Ghetto Kind Of Life: Dedicated to Jaclyn, With Love

Noa October 27, 2011 at 10:33 pm

My kitchen is fucking rad, and available for rent in exchange for tit photos.

Front Desk Ninja October 28, 2011 at 3:35 am

I hope you realise I’m lacking the ‘shame’ gene, and for a kitchen that fucking gorgeous, I would let you bounce nickels off them if you want.

Alicia October 27, 2011 at 10:46 pm

We love to share the love with Canada.

Alicia October 27, 2011 at 5:15 am

Holy shit! I fixed the video. Go to YouTube and watch the better version of our video. It’s not fucked up this time!

Noa October 27, 2011 at 10:34 pm

I shall post the good one.

Kelly October 27, 2011 at 9:28 am

Alicia, I was waiting for you to come after Noa with a sledgehammer all Misery-like, because “you just knoooow thinnnnnnngs”.

I love that the music was by “Midnight Creeper.”
Kelly recently posted..Oh no, I didunt…

Noa October 27, 2011 at 10:34 pm

It’s all meta n’shit, cause she’s brilliant.

Alicia October 27, 2011 at 10:55 pm

Episode 2 there will be a sledge hammer.

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