Funny Bitch Friday: Hyperbole and a Half

05/27/2011 · 43 comments

in Funny Bitch Friday

Are you the only blogger in the world that has not read Hyperbole and a Half?

Then, fuck you.

Seriously.

Allie Brosh is like the Tina Fey, the Amy Poehler, the Kristen Wiig of the blogging world. She doesn’t stop being funny. She can’t NOT be funny.

And what’s more, I cannot read even one of her posts without cracking a rib from laughing. They never get old, they never age.

They’re the purest form of fucking hilarity I know. And she’s even writing a book.

Sneaky Hate Spiral

Brick Games

Texas

The Party

Spaghatta Nahdle

Awkward Situation Survival Guide

This Is Why I’ll Never Be An Adult

And if you disagree, then perhaps–perhaps–you have no soul.

Something to think about.

From Dufmanno!: “Can you make me one of those “things I can do that an ordinary clown can’t do” lists in blue and white?
Mine can have splitting wood with axe.
Beautiful over the shoulder swing.
Mammoth taming
Ability to change the behavior of small rodents with Mattel’s “MINDFLEX”
Gosh, just to many to name.
Also imagine the possibilites that open up once you change his name to BOFFO.”
Honestly, y’all, I can’t even pick. Y’all opened up so much and shared such personal thoughts and feelings that I cannot thank you enough.
elizabeth- flourish in progress May 27, 2011 at 1:45 am

She is funnier than I can handle sometimes. Because I value intact ribs.
elizabeth- flourish in progress recently posted..This aint Wal-Mart

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:10 pm

Agreed. I have to force myself to stop reading less I bust a lung up.

Chunky Mama May 27, 2011 at 2:12 am
Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:10 pm

ooooooOOOOOOOooooooooOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooo……poor simple dog.

Abby May 28, 2011 at 4:33 pm

Agreed.
I love all her “simple” dog posts.
Abby recently posted..Roughing It

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:16 am

The Simple Dog is a shining beacon of funny.

Shane May 27, 2011 at 3:59 am

ooooo, and she’s writing a book! I wish I were writing a book. Maybe I should write a book. I like books with lots of pictures.

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:08 pm

If it’s Allie, they’ll be lovely pictures that make you piss your pants.

Kella May 27, 2011 at 4:16 am

Added to my shiny new Pulse iPad app! Now I have an even larger capacity for procrastinatory motherfuckery!
Kella recently posted..Hey- your foot doesn’t belong in there!

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:08 pm

Oh she’s fantastic. Hope you enjoy!

hoodyhoo May 27, 2011 at 6:18 am

I wholeheartedly agree — if Allie isn’t a Funny Bitch, I don’t know who is!
hoodyhoo recently posted..I Need an Old Priest and a Young Priest

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:08 pm

She’s the kind of funny to make one think that they are not funny at all.

Lynne May 27, 2011 at 7:04 am

“God of Cake” is one of my favorites, although “The Party” is right up there, too. Once when I had this awful craving for Krispy Kreme doughnuts, but was resisting terribly to go, I said that if I did make the pilgrimage and anyone walked in and caught me with the box that I’d look like Allie did when her mom walked in and saw her polishing off the last few crumbs of cake.

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:07 pm

The faces she draws are what kills me–they’re always so perfect for the situation.

Andi May 27, 2011 at 7:35 am

Allie is one of those bloggers that I am convinced would be my BFF in real life. She regularly has me both weeping with laughter and thinking, “My God, she lives inside my brain.”

My favorites are probably:
This Is Why I’ll Never Be An Adult
The Party
The Alot
Dog (I had a lot of dumb dogs as a kid, so I really relate to that one)
Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving
A Better Pain Scale
Andi recently posted..Obviously- you want eye candy

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:07 pm

She’s unnaturally talented, isn’t she? I can’t get enough.

Meg May 27, 2011 at 8:08 am

I love Simple Dog.
Meg recently posted..Our Last Five Days

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:06 pm

Oh goodness, Simple Dog. Who doesn’t love her?

momiss May 27, 2011 at 9:17 am

I love her too. The one where she was little and pretending to be Jesus at Christmas was the first one I ever read and remains my favorite to this day.

She writes without guile. Pretty hard to pull off after the age of 5. At least, it was for me. She is a genius in my book.
momiss recently posted..What FB Means To Me

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:06 pm

AH, Kenny Loggins Ruined Christmas? One of the best–I hate that I forgot to put that one up, but it was really hard to choose!

Handflapper May 27, 2011 at 12:06 pm

Hyperbole and a Half was the second blog I ever read. I have love/hate feelings toward Allie. Love because how can I not adore someone who makes me howl with laughter, and hate because my husband continually criticizes my blog because it doesn’t have enough funny pictures like “that High-per-bowl person.”

Yes, that is what I’m married to. It makes more sense just to hate him instead, doesn’t it?

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:04 pm

Yes, it does, because no one can be as funny as Allie Brosh.

Rebekah Mae May 27, 2011 at 12:13 pm

I love her! I can’t wait for her book to be published.

My favorite posts of hers are:
Dog (This is the first one I ever read. I still cry when I read it)
Dogs Don’t Understand Basic Concepts Like Moving
The Alot
Wolves
The Year Kenny Loggins Ruined Christmas

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:03 pm

I know. I can’t wait till that book comes out–I’ll read it in one sitting.

Jean May 27, 2011 at 12:55 pm
Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:03 pm

Oh, that’s a great one.

Cherrybomb May 27, 2011 at 2:40 pm

I heart Allie Brosh. And I’m glad you do too. If it wasn’t for her (found through b3ta.com) I would never have found The Bloggess and I would never have found you! So big ups to AllieB!
And you!
And the Bloggess!
And exclamation marks!

…I have no idea what I had in my life before these 3 fabulous components.

…just exclamation marks I guess.

!

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:03 pm

HOORAY EXCLAMATION MARKS AND ALLIE BROSH!!!

Johi May 27, 2011 at 4:17 pm

I’m glad that she doesn’t live in my town because I might *accidentally* stalk her, hoping that some of her funny can be absorbed through osmosis.
Johi recently posted..Im Tough Enough- Thank You Very Much

Noa May 27, 2011 at 5:03 pm

Oh God. Wouldn’t that be fantastic?

Siren May 27, 2011 at 5:53 pm

I don’t even remember how I first found Hyperbole and a Half but the post that hooked me was How a Fish Almost Destroyed My Childhood.

The amazing thing about Allie is she isn’t just funny on her blog, where she has days or weeks or MONTHS (torture!) to craft the perfect entry. She’s funny in real-time, too, or at least in the near-real-time that sometimes happens on forums. It’s like she has this mutant gene for lightning-fast hilarity. It’s totally intimidating. And kind of infuriating, now that I think about it. No one should be able to be that funny ALL THE TIME.
Siren recently posted..More Scrotum Birds for Your Viewing Pleasure

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:23 am

She’s just…amazing. I feel like such a douche for being all weird, but she’s totally fucking amazing. I can’t NOT laugh at anything she writes. It’s just not possible.

Geoffrey May 27, 2011 at 8:04 pm

Hyperbole and a Half was the first blog I ever read (it’s what inspired me to start mine). The first post I read was like a gateway drug, over the next few days (during lectures, work, discussion classes, etc) I read through everything on the site. I can’t even begin to describe the hilarity, but there were several instances when I would just burst out laughing in the middle of an otherwise serious lecture class and garner many furious looks from the more responsible students. I’d just wipe my eyes, hold my ribs together, and say “sorry”, pay attention to the class for about 2 minutes, then continue reading Allie’s work of literary and artistic genius!
Geoffrey recently posted..Im Never Going to the Dentist Again

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:21 am

It’s hard not to read Allie without busting out. It’s so rare to find someone so very funny who has inspired so man!

Rachael May 27, 2011 at 8:54 pm

I was in class when “The Party” showed up in my RSS feed. Loving Allie and her blog as much as I do, I immediately opened it and started reading. I spent the next twenty minutes reading one sentence, spending a minute doing everything I could think of to not laugh and STILL barely stifling the laugh, then the same for the next sentence, each picture, etc. I finally had to close it and read it when I got home because I hadn’t realized yet that my professor was paying as little attention to the class as I was. “PARP!” is my favorite exclamation.
Rachael recently posted..Why Wil Wheaton Totally Could But Shouldn’t Start a Religion

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:20 am

We went to the park today with some friends, and that’s all I could think about. “I HAVE TO RUN ACROSS THE PARP, MOUMMMM. THE PARP!”

Kelly May 27, 2011 at 8:56 pm

Allie Brosh makes me have Jerry McGuire moments:

“You complete me.”

“SHOW ME THA SPAGHATTA NAHDLE!”

I love that fucking pasta. And the alot. I want one. It’s so snuggly.

But the Kenny Loggins Christmas – I really think I dribbled a little.
Kelly recently posted..Things I do when I should be doing other stuff

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:20 am

Spaghatta Nahdle is something I frequently impersonate around my house, and for which Adrian feels a large amount of resentment.

Eejaye May 27, 2011 at 10:41 pm

Hyperbole is the first blog that let me know that I wasn’t the only weirdo with this sense of humor. She was my gateway drug into the blogging world (to use someone else’s analogy) of all the funny bitches out there.

And she introduced me to the Tyrannowhorus Rex. And for that I am eternally grateful.

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:19 am

Allie is officially the weed of blogging.

The Onion May 28, 2011 at 10:13 am

Sneaky Hate Spiral and God of Cake are a few of my favorites. When Kenny Loggins ruined Christmas is pretty awesome as well. I led the Baboo’s read them. I know I shouldn’t always, but I don’t want them to grow up and be dull.
The Onion recently posted..Indie Ink Challenge – Denial

Noa May 30, 2011 at 12:18 am

Hey–those are good reads, no matter who you are.

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